gay sex trauma

What if you’ve experienced trauma?

We all carry different levels of trauma when it comes to the body and emotions. Mindful sex and intimacy coaching is not specifically designed to work with serious trauma, but it can help you build a new way forward with your body and with relating.

What is trauma anyway?

Particularly when it comes to sex and intimacy, all of us carry many different types of trauma in our bodies, both physical and emotional.  How we experience and process trauma will be different for each of us.

Broadly speaking, there are two levels, which can be classified as large ‘T’ traumas and small ‘t’ traumas. (You can read more about how to recognise different types of trauma here). The difference in how these two levels of trauma feel is sometimes described as being the difference between being submerged and overwhelmed by a wave (large ‘T’), or being able to float on the surface of the wave and observe it while experiencing it (small ‘t’).

Coaching with me is about working with your body in the moment. Of course this may include responses which have been created through trauma, but our aim in sessions is to be able to stay present with what you feel, and notice it, without being submerged by it.

Can sessions with me address your trauma?

Although I work with touch in a way which is designed to be as safe as possible any work which involves the body will have the potential to unlock trauma which may be carried within it, either consciously or unconsciously.

Sexological Bodywork and the Wheel Of Consent are not designed to be a replacement for medical or psychological trauma therapy.

If you do seek to work with me specifically around any serious sex, abuse or other trauma-related issues (or if memories of this kind of trauma arise during our work together) it’s probable that I will request that our work be carried out in parallel with a qualified psychotherapist or counseling professional, particularly if our work is likely to involve intimate touch.

I am always happy to discuss options for how we may work together if this is the case; your safety is my paramount concern (read more about my professional ethics and protocols).